Joke of the Day

A boy watches a beautiful girl sitting right next to him and writes on a paper "I love you, do you love me?". He passes the paper to her. She replies "NO". He didn't give up. He rubbed her answer and passed it on to another girl and she replied "YES".

Moral of the story : Definitely not what you think. It is "Save Earth, Recycle Paper!!!"

Joke : Financial Management

A beggar to another beggar : I had a grand dinner at Taj yesterday.

How? The other beggar asked.

First begger : Some one gave me a Rs 100/- note yesterday.
I went to Taj and ordered dinner worth Rs 1,000/-,
and enjoyed the dinner.  When the bill came, I said, I had no money.
The Taj manager called the police man, and handed me over to him.
 I gave the Rs 100/- note to the police fellow, and he set me free.

..................A wonderful example of financial management indeed.

Domain Knowledge is Very Important!!!

There was this family with one kid. One day the mother was out and dad was in charge of the kid, who just turned three.

Someone had given the kid a little 'tea set' as a birthday gift and it was one of his favorite toys. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when kid brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea from father, kid’s Mom came home.

Dad made her wait in the living room to watch the kid bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!!'

Mom waited, and sure enough, the kid comes down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up, then she says to him, 'Did it ever occur to you that the only place that baby can reach to get water is the toilet??'

J ....Mothers know!!

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Domain knowledge is very important!!! Else your supplier will trick you......

Newtons Laws of Love | Newton in Romantic Mood

We all have studied Newtons laws of motions. Here we tried to think what would be the Newton's laws if he would have written them for love, instead of motions. Here are Newtons Laws of Love which remained unpublished so far. 

Universal Law:

"Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transfer from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money."

First Law:

"A boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or unless any external agent (brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy."

Second Law:

"The rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance."

Third Law:

"The force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping."

Do Not Laugh

Reducing the Phone Bills

The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting... on a Saturday morning... after breakfast...

Dad : People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office.

Mum : Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone.

Son : Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile.

Maid : So - what is the problem? We all use our work telephones !

Do Not Laugh

 Overconfidence Kills

It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.

The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right!" the boy said,

"But, how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said.

The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."

"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.

The next gift was from the son of the liquor storeowner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more big taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"

With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

Joke Of The Day

A man walks past a beggar every day and gives him Rs.10 and that Continues for a year. Then suddenly the daily donation changes to Rs. 7, 50.

"Well," the beggar thinks, " it’s still better than nothing."

A year passes in this way until the man’s daily donation suddenly becomes Rs. 5.

"What’s going on now?" the beggar asks his donor. " First you give me Rs. 10 every day, then Rs. 7,50 and now only Rs. 5. What’s the problem?"

" Well," the man says, " last year my eldest son went to university. It’s very expensive, so I had to cut costs. This year my eldest daughter also went to university, so I had to cut my expenses even further ."


"And how many children do you have?" the beggar asks.

"Four," the man replies.

"Well," says the beggar, " I hope you don’t plan to educate them all at my expense".

Pay Attention

1st year students of M.B.B.S. were attending their 1st anatomy class.
They all gathered around the surgery table with a real dead dog.
The Professor started class by telling two important qualities as a Doctor.
The 1st is that NEVER BE DISGUSTED FOR ANYTHING ABOUT BODY,
e.g. He inserted his finger in dog's mouth & on drawing back tasted it in his own mouth.

Then he said them to do the same.
The students hesitated for several minutes.
But eventually everyone inserted their fingers in dog's mouth & then tasted it.

When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and said:
The most important 2nd quality is OBSERVATION, I inserted my Middle finger but tasted the Index finger.
Now learn to pay attention.

Moral of the story : Life is tough but it’s a lot tougher when you are not paying attention.

Do Not Laugh

A man walks past a beggar every day and gives him Rs. 10 and that Continues for a year. Then suddenly the daily donation changes to Rs. 7.50.

"Well," the beggar thinks," it’s still better than nothing."

A year passes in this way until the man’s daily donation suddenly becomes Rs. 5.

"What’s going on now?" the beggar asks his donor. "First you give me Rs. 10 every day, then Rs. 7.50 and now only Rs. 5. What’s the problem?"

"Well," the man says,"last year my eldest son went to university. It’s very expensive, so I had to cut costs. This year my eldest daughter also went to university, so I had to cut my expenses even further."

"And how many children do you have?" the beggar asks.

"Four," the man replies.

"Well," says the beggar,"I hope you don’t plan to educate them all at my expense".

Do Not Laugh

He had just lost his job

Peter was telling a friend that he had just lost his job. “Why did the foreman fire you?” the friend asked in surprise.
“Oh,” Peter said, “you know how foreman are. They stand around with their hands in their pockets watching everybody else work.”
“We all know that,” replied his friend. “But why did he let you go?”
“Jealousy,” answered Pete. “All the other workers thought I was the foreman.”

Do Not Laugh

Boss to Sales Executive: Get 5 lacs business by today evening anyhow.
Sales Executive: That's Impossible Sir!
Boss: What Impossible? Impossible word itself says I'm possible.


In Evening...,
Executive: Boss, I got 10 lacs business.
Boss: Great! How come this miracle happened?
Executive: I cheated the client.
Boss: That's Immoral.
Executive: What Immoral? Immoral word itself says I'm moral.